Even though I am a teacher by training, this journey called homeschooling has been FRAUGHT with worry... self-doubt... and fear. I worry constantly if I'm giving my kids a good enough education. I worry if they will get in to college. I wonder if I'm making a huge mistake. And I do worry about that QUINTESSENTIAL homeschooling dilemma: will they be properly equipped to socialize with other people. These students were my most important students. My success or failure with these ones mattered the most.
Yesterday was Noah's last day. He graduated! by homeschooling... and I realized.... this child is PERFECTLY equipped for the future he has chosen. For the future that has been his desire since he was 10 years old. He is perfectly ready to "yes sir" and push up and salute his way through basic training. He is ready to SERVE this country in an honorable and dedicated manner. I know in my heart this child will be a BEAST in the Army. And guess what??? God knew all along that this was his next step. When I was worrying and wondering about ACTs, portfolios, admissions interviews.... God was sitting there whispering "trust me"... because none of those things were THIS child's future. He aced his ASVAB. He is KILLING his physical fitness requirements. He is dotting every i and crossing every t the Army outs in front of him.
I think my biggest takeaway from the past year is the fact that it was OK that I didn't know the end game because God did. I didn't have to worry about college or SATs or even careers. My job was to obey God. He told me to homeschool these children. I just needed to be as faithful as possible in the teaching and loving and every day molding and then leave the outcome in His hands. I knew this... but know I really KNOW this.
Mommas out there... homeschoolers... will you TRY to believe me... every changed diaper... wiped nose... sticky kiss... learned math fact... memorized Bible verse... they matter... do them faithfully but let God worry about orchestrating all those things into an amazing human being. Also will someone please remind me of this with the next three???